Monday, August 23, 2010

Sham of a Wedding

Warning: There is going to be a lot of "dirt" in this post. Things are getting a little dramatic on my end of the screen and I just need to vent!

A year ago on August 15th I had the pleasure of standing up in my cousin K's wedding. It was a beautiful ceremony and a wonderful celebration. Her mom is sort of non-existent in her life (except to ask for money) so my Aunt C, my grandma, and I chipped in quite a lot. She had a fairy tale wedding, it was truly wonderful. The love between her and her husband W was evident and it was just so sweet!

W is in the Army. He has been for years. W and K knew he'd be getting deployed in December of '09 (thus the fall '09 wedding). W left for boot camp and was coming back for leave this month before he is sent over seas. A couple days before he was to return I get this text message:

"Walt and I are getting a divorce. It was a really hard decision but I just need to tell someone."

She claimed that W's being deployed and eventual trip overseas was just too hard on them. I tried to convince her to at least grt the help of a therapist before seeking a divorce. But she had already made up her mind. She tried to pass this all off as a mutual decision but 4 days later...

She's back in a relationship.

With one of the groomsmen in her wedding.

And she's posting this crap all over FB.


I can't get over it! This seems so distasteful and I am truly appalled. I feel terrible for W who will be sent overseas in a few days. I can't believe he came home to his life shattering and now he has to go to an unfamiliar land.

I feel like that whole wedding between W and K was such a sham. I am so angry at K...she was married for only 1 year!

Maybe with time I will be able to more productively channel my anger but for right now I think I need to keep my distance from K. I don't even know what would come out of my mouth if I had to see her face to face.

So that is my rant, thank you for listening. Tips on how to deal with all this craziness are welcome.


Lana said...

OH BOY! What a sad story. I think you are right in keeping your distance from K. I would also encourage you to keep in touch with W. if he is ok with the communication. It might be a good thing for him to know that you support him as he goes off to serve his country.

Rachel W. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rachel W. said...

Thanks Lana! Great advice! My husband has contacted W to tell him he is sorry things went down the way that they did. He also thanked him for his service. I am thinking of getting a care package put together for W to send overseas.

sEy said...

that is so sad and I understand why you feel like that. I agree with Lana that you should keep distance with K right now and give W some support so that he would know that he is not alone. Things like that were really depressing and it would be better that he knew there is someone he could lean on.

La Belle Vie said...

Wow!!! That is shocking!! I have to say I found the first year of marriage the hardest. I also think it would be hard to be separated during that first year, but I can't imagine getting divorced because of that! She knew what she was marrying into! My head shakes in surprise.

That really is horrible... I imagine one day she'll have a lot of regrets... Her behaviour is really tacky.

Meg O. said...

DUDE. I would be just as mad! I think it's extremely selfish when people do stuff like that! And her reasoning for divorcing him seems like BS!!! I'm sorry, I might not know the whole story but I really think it's crap. Like Lana said in her first comment, it probably is a good idea to stay away from K and give W your support. Some people will just never be happy.... maybe she is one of those people. Maybe we don't know the whole story. Who knows? The way she's behaving about it is inappropriate and you are allowed to vent! That's what we're here for!

janjan said...

OMG!! That was cruel. sorry but i dont think her reason for having a divorce is that her husband will be deployed. i think she just fell out of love. but anyway, im in no position to judge her or to comment about the whole situation coz i don't know the real score between them, but my heart goes out to the must have been hard.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Lana also. And your idea of sending him a care package is a great idea. Heep some distance from K and let her act a fool. Im sure it will come back to bite her in the butt. somehow. Karma!!