Thursday, April 22, 2010

TTC & Adoption...Our Journey

I have been sort of hesitant to share our journey to having a child on my blog. For me it is a very private thing. I don’t tell anyone except my husband and my parents.

I’ve decided that it might be good for me, even therapeutic, to write our journey thus far. Writing has been such a great outlet for me my entire life. And I came to realize that I have never once written about this particular part of my life…even in my personal journal. So here goes!

I’ve wanted to have a baby ever since we got married September of 2007. But at that point I was still in the middle of recovery from my eating disorder. I had a lot of work to do, and some weight to gain before pregnancy was even an option. So for a year and a half I struggled to do what I needed to do in order to prepare my body for a child. I sought therapy and gained more weight.

At my Doctors appointment in August of ’09 I was given the green light to start baby making. I was pretty excited. She felt I should be able to become pregnant!

So we started TTC.

We realized after a number of months that AF wasn’t exactly regular and that we could never predict exactly when I would O. So we sought the help of a fertility specialist. She put me on clomid. Thankfully the clomid regulated AF and I started to O regularly. But still no + on that darn stick!!!

Hubers and I started to discuss how far with infertility treatments we were willing to go.

I want to stress that the following is just our own personal decision. It’s not what we feel is best for everyone, but because of our personalities and our pasts this is what is best for us.

We came to the conclusion that we would not go past the clomid. We were fine with them increasing the dosage if they felt that would help. But anything past that step we were not going to try.

There were a number reasons for that choice. We felt that if after the clomid I was not pregnant God was leading us in a different direction, so why fight it? We believe strongly in adoption and have been touched by the need for good adoptive parents.

The other reason for not going past clomid was personal to me. I had been in and out of hospitals throughout high school…the idea of going through all that medical treatment was a little daunting. We both felt that forcing a baby to come from me when there are children waiting for homes didn’t seem right.

So my hubby and I agreed that adoption would be a better use of our money then infertility treatments.

We decided to keep TTC but also start the search for an adoption agency.

As of now I am still on clomid and we are not completely ruling out me becoming pregnant. We are also registered at 2 adoption agencies and we are in the waiting process with them to start our home study.

So there you have it…our journey so far! I am really praying that we will get word from one of the agencies soon…either that or I will finally become pregnant myself.

Please keep us in your prayers.


janjan said...

i admire you for wanting to become a mother coz i don't see myself becoming one at least in the next five years. i hope you'll have that precious little one you've been praying for.

btw, i like your template. very feminine.

Tiffany said...

I have a friend who blogs about her IVF and how her husband and her are trying to have a baby... Her name is Lori, if you don't follow her blog you should. You two would get along great
My Blog Click Here!

Maddycakes said...

Stopping by for a visit from FF. I am especially touched by your post regarding adopting a baby. I was adopted and I'm so grateful that I had the wonderful family that I have. A good friend of mine just went through an adoption agency and is getting a newborn in June. God is good and I will be praying for you and your hubby.
BTW, I was told I could never have a baby but was blessed with my miracle at age 40!

I own a children's theme party business but my blog is about frugal ideas and creative tips for entertaining and parties.

ashley said...

I write a healthy lifestyles blog, I think you would enjoy!
love the style of your blog, found you on friday follow, follow back!
can't wait to read MORE!!

Mayra, mommy to Pooh Bear said...

What a touching story.

You will both be blessed, whether it's through you or adoption.

I cannot imagine what it feels like but I admire your courage for sharing it through here. I plan on adopting in the future as well. I'm so glad there's people like you out there. People with hearts of gold.

PS. Love your blog template! & the title as well. I'm a fellow Fashionista. =)

-Have a great weekend, stopping by from ff.

Jennifer said...

I love that you shared your story! I'm also excited that you are waiting on your home study. We turned in all our paperwork to start ours this week. Now we just need to get approved. I'm so nervous!

1001tears said...

What a beautiful, honest post. I am the proud Mama to a China princess. She came home in August of '09. I pray that God will grant you the desires of your heart.